As a regular reader of the glory that is the craigslist missed connections page, I can't help wondering how it will evolve over time. Sure, 90% or more of the posters there are still nothing more than guys who lack the balls to approach other guys they're infatuated with, but there's always that small minority for whom it's something more. Do they represent the wave of the future? It's hard to know: evolution on a species level is pretty easy to understand because we have millions of years of fossil record, and thousands of people with university appointments and hard and soft funding (as with many things, hard is better) who have worked and continued to work on the matter. With the clmc, we're still in the throes of evolution: something that happens today may or may not provide an evolutionary advantage and recur tomorrow. And in place of thousands of academics and Charles Darwin, there's just me. And I think it would be safe to say that I'm somewhat less serious about my study than Mr. Darwin was about his. On the plus side, though, I don't have craigslist creationist fundamentalists to contend with. Yet.
Anyway, I was cataloguing specimens yesterday when I came across a development that seemed out of place. An entire semi-anonymous vindictive smackdown/pile on was taking place right in front of me. Here's the first post I saw.
For The Indian FRONTRUNNER who doesn't want his name used - m4m - 32
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Reply to: pers-511580286@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-16, 11:03PM EST
I would be a better friend to him than you. Give me his e-mail address like you said you would. Joseph (thanks for his name)seems like a gentleman. Too god for you. I will be his friend and more. DUde this wasn't about you, so get over youreslf. Who cares how u spell it, you got that it ws you. Maybe you are the casue of the terribel things he is going through. oh and here is what you said in case you forgotten. Can't wait to see if your man enough.I really don't want my name used on a craigslist posting. If there's something you (whoever you are) want to know about Joseph and me, you are welcome to ask. Both of us have enough drama in our lives right now without mystery postings. Yes we are broken up. If you want to contact him, I'll even give you his email address if you don't have it by now. Since you are in love with him, maybe you can help him deal with all the terrible things that are happening in his life right now. He could probably use a good friend right now. If not, please stay away from both of us. By the way, my name is spellled Vijay, not VJ.
Obviously, I was late to the party on this one and missed an earlier post or posts, but there was already a lively back and forth (and back and forth and back and forth) going on about this frontrunner person in response to the above post. I've certainly never heard any of the Democratic or Republican frontrunners called any variant of Vijay, but I couldn't help wondering whether the clmc is becoming the new home of the whisper campaign. You know, some Roveian posts something like "Hot Granddaddy Senator I Hooked Up With at Union Station" and suddenly John McCain is losing the South Carolina primary.
[By the way, I would like to take this opportunity to deny that this post is little more than a cheap excuse to post pictures of cute Desi guys. This is research, people. As it happens, I didn't even know, until a couple of days ago that "Desi" means "from the Indian subcontinent." I just assumed it meant Cuban, as an homage to Desi Arnaz, but apparently the word "Desi" means something like homeboy in Hindi or Urdu. Or something. I'm sure there's a fuller explanation at www.ratedesi.com., or at least there are more interesting pictures there than in the Wikipedia entry. I gather that the term "Desi" is considered descriptive rather than pejorative by the people it describes. I hope I'm right about that.]
Anyway, the first shot seemed to violate the anonymous/unknown nature of craigslists postings. There was the trademark lameness and desperation, but channeled towards an entirely different objective. The first reply seemed to take the original poster to task for not playing by the rules. Call it the evolutionary pushback:
RE:For The Indian FRONTRUNNER who doesn't want his name used - m4m - 3 - m4m
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Reply to: pers-512685188@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-17, 10:52PM EST
What makes you think he's Indian? He happens to have been born here, so that makes him American. Besides, was it necessary to post his message in the first place? How about just respecting someone's request and moving on?
Oh, and by the way: in your first post about his then-boyfriend, which I saw a few months ago, you didn't seem to have too much to say about the guy being a gentleman. In fact, the only thing you mentioned was that he had a nice ass. Really classy.
And learn to run spell check. You're barely literate.
As the kids say, "Ooooh, burn." Apparently this dispute has been simmering for months. Naturally, the original poster could not leave this attack unanswered:
RE:For The Indian FRONTRUNNER who doesn't want his name used - m4m - 3 - m4m
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Reply to: pers-512829802@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 2:41AM EST
His background is Indian no matter where he is born. i posted his message because i wanted him to give me joesph's email address like he said. i knew he wouldn't do it . if you red his message he said if i wanted to be a firend then he would give me the address. if joesph is in trouble i will help. he said to move on if i wouldn't help. i want to know what is going on. yes i mentioned his ass,nothing wrong with that. from what i saw and when i talked to him he was very nice too. thanks for the tip on spell check. i wasn't born here so my spelling and english is not great, but i have 2 degrees and speak three languages. how about you?
Location: Washington Dc
I'd like to make a few points here. 1. Complimenting a gay man's ass is never out of line. 2. As much as I appreciate and attempt to practice correct spelling, grammar, and usage, I don't think you get very far by calling someone out on his linguistic difficulties. If you write correctly yourself, you automatically call attention to the other guy's deficiencies without looking like a martinet. 3. If you weren't born here and have two degrees and speak three languages, call me!
Anyway, it's worth remembering that nothing on the clmc is private. That, indeed, is why people post there. I don't think, though, that they expect as much chiming in as they got in this case. Here's the next post from an interested but disinterested observer:
RE INDIAN FRONTERUNNER - m4m - 26
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Reply to: pers-513012208@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 10:20AM EST
So whats wrong with Joseph?? is He ok?? When did him and they other guy break up?? Is the Indian the ex or is the other guy the ex of Joseph? or does the Indian Guy just know Joseph?? We're pulling for Joseph!!
Location: DC and Other's Fascinated by this story.
Pardon me for a moment while I do some deep breathing to get over that greengrocer's plural. There, that's better.
The story of Joseph and Vijay (and the mysterious poster) seems to have struck a nerve. And not just one:
RE: INDIAN FRONTRUNNER - m4m - 41
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Reply to: pers-513125005@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 12:17PM EST
I am also rooting for Joseph. My friend told me that he is having some very serious health issues, I think lupus or something like that. Then the guy dumps him! Self involved (*^&*%^*&^)! I wouldn't want my name mentioned either.
Location: Virginia - I know the answers
I have little tolerance for people who claim to know the answers but won't tell them. If you know something, either share it or keep your fingers still about it. Otherwise, you look like a dick. "Looking like a dick" is only good when it's meant literally. And then, only if the guy saying it is a power bottom.
The story continues to unfold:
RE : FRONTRUNNERS SAGA - m4m - 32
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Reply to: pers-513651858@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 8:49PM EST
Are other people actually following this story? What kind crap is this? it's interesting. I certainly hope Joseph is okay with his Lupus. What an asshole to dump him for being diagnosed with a chronic illness. It sounds callous, but i'm not so sure I would have stayed with him either. Then Again, I dont really know.
By the way, so does the Indian fellow not want people to know his identity? Despite the fact that this poor gay running group is now tainted with drama.... that, my friends, is fascinating.
Location: DC
I have to say that public sentiment seems to be running against Vijay. If there's a prom queen race riding on this, he probably shouldn't be counting on that tiara. But the feeling is not unanimous:
Frontrunner Saga - m4m
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Reply to: pers-513732294@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 10:28PM EST
To clear the record up, the Indian guy did not dump Joseph because he has cancer. Joseph moved away and the Indian guy didn't go with him. I went on a few dates with the Indian guy and he is exremely nice and thoughtful. Jesus Christ. This is like some Sweet Valley High bullshit.
Of course, it does sound a bit fishy for someone who'd gone "on a few dates" with Vijay to be writing in and defending him. But, hey, maybe he's just that great a
Frontrunners the real scoop - m4m
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Reply to: pers-513971471@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-19, 6:43AM EST
Is it cancer? Is it lupus? How do you know what is true? When did you date him? If you dated Vijay why did you break up? I think you are Vijay. If you are, I dated you too for about a month. I believe you would dump someone because they were sick. You dumped a lot of guys for a lot less. Why haven't we heard from Joseph? If he moved away, why did he? I saw your pathetic it is "all about poor little ole Vijay don't use my name" explanation. You are not so nice and egocentric. I am glad that people are finding out about the real you. You have a dark side. Get some help for yourself.
Location: DC
Okay, fellas. I'm not in the business of defending players, but reality check: he's just not that into you! Get over it and get on with your life. Nobody wants to hear the dumped guy get bitter. And don't tell Vijay he needs therapy. Maybe he does, but all the indications are that he has no trouble finding as many guys as he wants and dating them for as long as he wants. Maybe he's not happy deep down, but I reckon he's exactly the guy he wants to be.
Of course, some people really don't think this sort of post/discussion belongs in the hallowed pages of the clmc at all:
Frontrunners drama bullshit everyone is sick of hearing your shit - m4m - 40
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Reply to: pers-514292775@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-19, 1:46PM EST
Save your -Fags of our lives- story for another place. Fucking drama!
Location: Washington, DC
That last post, btw, was only up for a short while before it disappeared. I reckon it must have been flagged by the (apparently large) pro-drama contingent. Fluke or natural selection? You be the judge.
Then, today, the last word (so far) from yet another of Vijay's bitter castoffs.
Can't hide from the Truth Indian Frontrunner - m4m - 37
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Reply to: pers-514839861@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-19, 11:51PM EST
I dated him for about six months. He dumped me when I too was going through some health issues. It is a pattern. Then he tries to make himself look good by lying about it and telling everyone a fake story. Joseph good luck to you buddy. You are better off without someone who can't stick by you. And those of you who think he is your friend, you should of heard what he said about you behind your back. Your too fat, too talkative, too codependent. I guess when you are perfect you can be so judgemental. Well your not Vijay. I am glad you are out of my life.
Location: DC
Again, I don't condone mistreating the guys you date. I'm just thinking that if Vijay's that bad to that many people, he must have a reputation, and these guys all knew what they were getting into. I think maybe these guys should stop whinging all over the clmc. They can form a support group and whinge to each other. But don't most guys form support groups to get laid? That's not going to work for these men: they're clearly all bottoms. But maybe they can have a BYOD (bring your own dildo: the host supplies the lube) bitchfest/sex toy party. Send me the pictures, boys!
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