Keine Angst, readers. I have not decided on a format change, nor will I be renaming the blog to Cute with TED. It's just that I always try to start with a SFW picture, and the one I uploaded was a Tom of Finland drawing. You wouldn't expect ToF to be SFW, but I didn't look carefully (at all), so that while I initially thought I could get away with it, the humongous uncut cock of the man on his knees convinced me otherwise. Rest assured that the rest of the pictures are seriously NSFW, as pictures illustrating a post about a cocksucker are wont to be. Enjoy the kitten. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find pictures of cute kittens on the net? Almost as difficult as it is to find pictures of men sucking cock.
Anyway, Monday afternoon I was feeling the effects of having worked both Saturday and Sunday, and I was in a mood. It was the sort of mood that would have been best ameliorated by a thorough plowing of a hot ass attached to a guy whose real name I never learned, and upon whose ass -- after a suitable period of shoving him down on his bed, kissing him hard, chewing on his nipples, and eating his hot, sweet ass while he went down on me -- I had discarded a full condom, leaving the cum to pool in the small of his back as I dressed and walked back to my car. But I didn't have a lot of time, so I answered a CL ad from a married guy who said that he loved to suck cock and would also take it up the ass. He sounded hot, so I sent him a meat pic, and he told me he would love to suck it and get fucked by it, so I told him I only fucked safe, and he told me that was fine but that I should bring my own condoms because he didn't have any that would accommodate my girth.
Here's a did-you-know for y'all. Did you know that back when I was married, my wife worked for a major U.S. regulatory agency? One of her areas to monitor was condoms, and she told me that, at the time, the standard condoms being put out by the major condom manufacturers were too narrow for fully a third of American men's penises. So, yeah, a standard condom doesn't fit me, but that doesn't mean that I have monster dick. This guy really wanted monster dick, so he convinced himself that I had one.
Anyway, the guy's apartment wasn't exactly on the way home, but it wasn't too terribly far out of the way, either, so I told him I'd drop by around 7, and he seemed eager to be my host. When he answered the door, I thought he was very cute. He'd said 34, 5'7, 140, and I think that was accurate, though I might have guessed that he weighed a little less than that. Anyway, he looked good, and he had a shaved head, which I always love on a short, trim man. (Or a tall, thick man, or, well, most anyone, really.) I asked to use his bathroom, and while I was in there, I realized that I'd left the condoms, etc. in the car. But I figured that what this guy really wanted was to suck me off, so I was pretty sure that anal wouldn't come up if I didn't bring it up.
When I got back to the living room, I grabbed him, pulled off his shirt ("I guess I'm going to suck you without my shirt on, huh?"), rubbed his nipples a bit, and grabbed him. I figured kissing him would be a no-go, but I wanted to confirm, and I'd been right. He had a chest fairly well covered with dirty blond hair, which was also very attractive. But I reckon that he wanted to show what a straight man he was because he was also wearing giant baggy basketball shorts with shoes to match. I tried to pull the shorts off, but I only got them down far enough so that I could slap his ass a couple of times. No big deal, but then I turned to look at his giant TV screen, and he had some straight bukkake video going. He smiled at me and said "Pretty hot, huh?" and I just said "uhhh." But then he started to unfasten my pants, so it was easy to ignore the porn.
He started playing with my cock, and when he asked "Are you going to get it nice and hard for me?" I laughed and said, "I think you're going to get it nice and hard for me." He asked me if I wanted to sit down. I was standing right next to the sofa, but I was facing the TV, and watching some Barbie play with four guys' rods really wasn't doing anything for me. He offered me a chair in the corner, and I accepted. He got on his knees and got to work. The boy definitely had skills.
The corner chair turned out not to be such a great idea. It was a lot like an Ikea chair that I have at home. They're very comfortable to sit in, but the frame is so flexible that if you're moving at all, you sort of bounce up and down, and since this chair was in the corner with a lamp right behind it, when he'd go down on me, I'd lean back and bump the lamp. This would probably have been more of a problem if he hadn't been such a fine cocksucker. Which, by the way, is what he most wanted to hear. When I told him, "Damn, you're a good cocksucker," he asked me to say it again. He got increasingly verbal, and I did my best to keep up so that he'd know he was doing a good job. The chair might have helped with that: I couldn't really zone out and just abandon myself to the bj because I kept banging against the lamp pole. So I moved forward in the chair a bit, grabbed both sides of his shaved head, and forced him up and down my cock. He loved that. Every time I'd do it, he'd make some sort of noise that meant "yum" and he'd put his hands together behind his back and take it until he was about to gag. Then he'd pull off, flash me a huge grin, and tell me how much he liked my cock.
After a while, I thought it would be really fun to play with his ass while he was going down on me. I also thought it would be hot to have him lie on his back with his head off the edge of the bed so I could fuck his face that way, but when I asked whether he had a bed we could use, he looked confused, and then told me that he really wanted to be on his knees. We all want what we want, right? And since I like a lot more things than this guy does, it was no big deal to go along with him especially since (did I mention this?) he really was a first rate cocksucker.
Anyway, we moved back to the sofa, and I did my best to concentrate on the very hunky guys who were getting sucked and then blowing huge loads all over the women's faces, but really, it just sort of went past me. I didn't find it disturbing, but I couldn't find any part of it exciting. It was like a particularly dull documentary -- or some instructional video you might have seen in high school physics class. As we went on, he talked more and more, usually saying the same things: how he was working up to taking the whole cock back into his throat, how much he loved being a "nasty" cocksucker, and how he was doing a good job because I was giving him such a nice big cock to suck on. This would have been more convincing if a) I really did have monster dick and b) what he had swinging between his legs hadn't obviously been a nice thick piece of uncut meat. He didn't get hard, and it was against a very trim body, so maybe it didn't get as big as mine did hard, but I sort of felt like telling him that if he liked thick dick as much (and had as much trouble finding it) as he claimed, he should really just take yoga classes until he was sufficiently flexible to suck himself off. Anyway, he kept up the narrative, at one point asking me, "Do you like it when I tell you what a big dick you have?" How do you answer a question like that? I suppose I could have burst into tears and say how my cock had destroyed my dreams of being a jockey and riding a Triple Crown winner, but somehow I sensed that mentioning horses would only give him some other erroneous point of reference to my cock. So I went with, "Sure. Who wouldn't?" I'm not sure whether it's just the way I am or if it was because of the guy or the ambience (i.e., the straight porn and the inane chatter), but I was never really able to get lost in the blowjob the way I can get lost in making out or working a guy's nipples or eating his ass. It's not a bad thing, really, and I certainly did have a terrific time with this guy (mad cocksucking skills), but I never stopped thinking and analyzing. I'm sure I've said this before, but someday I really want a good blowjob while I'm reading some good porn. Anyway, after maybe 40 minutes of very good oral, I could tell that the guy was about at the point where he really wanted his reward. Fortunately, his cat came in the room, and he had to pick it up to shut it in a bedroom, and he said, "jerk yourself off," so in the twenty seconds he was gone, I brought myself right to the edge, and when he came back and asked, I told him I was really close, so he dove back on and took a substantial load.
Then he stood up and said, in a very garbled voice, that he needed to go look at it, by which I understood that he was going to go to the bathroom and look at my ejaculate on his tongue in the mirror. I was panting a bit, so I was in no condition to argue, and, really, why not? He came back with a very great smile on his face. I pointed to my cock, which had another blob of cum on the tip, and he reached down with his thumb, pulled the blob off, and stuck it in his mouth, as if I had plum-cum, and he was Little Jack Horner.
Anyway, it was one of those encounters that you know going in is a sure to be a one-off, but it did put me in a much more relaxed mood. And he got to spend most of an hour on his knees and receive a healthy load, so I reckon everyone was happy.