Friday, April 4, 2008

No Shit.

The Blog-O-Cuss Meter - Do you cuss a lot in your blog or website?
Created by OnePlusYou

WTF? I don't know whether to be upset because it's so high or so low. I'm trying to figure out which 43% of my posts don't contain cussing. I guess it's okay if you say, "I penetrated him with my throbbing man-cucumber" as long as you don't say "fuck." I wonder whether "buttsex" counts. In any case, apparently my swearing level is at 613% of normal, so I guess I've accomplished something.

I actually spend a lot of time (well, compared to how much time everyone else spends) worrying about the lost efficacy of cursing in contemporary society. There was a time when you really could almost never say "fuck," but nowadays, in lots of places, you can say "motherfucker," and no one even winces. Swearing has lost its impact.

Of course, I still work with someone who blushes at most swearing. She didn't believe us when we told her that "clusterfuck" is a common term, so now we use it around her as often as possible. And, truly, in any office setting, the opportunities to say "clusterfuck" are almost endless.

We should probably all tone down the swearing a little so that there'd be something left to say in truly extreme situations. (I suppose it's possible that the increase in swearing is due to an increase in truly extreme situations, but I doubt that our increasingly chaotic lives are significant factors.)

I got the cuss-o-meter from Mr. Wordo over at Sticky Crows. At least that's what I call him. He goes by "tornwordo," and most of his readers call him "torn," so I assume that's his given name. Using the proper form of address with people on the Internet is a thorny matter, and I just try to do the best I can.

I'm totally underwater at work right now. It's pretty bad. Tonight, I'm supposed to be hosting a thirty-two-year-old cute guy who wants to call me Daddy while I penetrate him with my throbbing man-cucumber, but I'm so backed up at work that I'd be relieved if he canceled.

I realize it's not much of a post, but here's a hot naked guy for your trouble.

5 comments:

tornwordo said...

Just don't call me shirley ; ) Man-cucumber? You can do better than that, I'm sure.

Franciscus van Munster said...

I think any cursing should be strategically placed, otherwise it loses impact. I just can't take people who use the word fuck for punctuation seriously.

Anonymous said...

Yahoo has a nice feature on their games webpage that substitutes a @ for each letter in a certain list of cusswords (never tried "buttsex" though). It makes typing them out so much faster--just the one key. And really one @@@@ is as good as a @@@, @@@@ or @@@-@@@@ anyway.

Anonymous said...

That's one reason that I don't curse much...because it loses it's impact.

Once at work, I almost said something in a meeting but managed swallow my words and hold it in. But then, my boss encouraged me to say what I was going to -- I don't think he realized I was going to start cussing (god damned this and god damned that), lol!

The whole office got quiet -- they'd never heard me cuss!

Anonymous said...

me too - i hardly ever swear in front of family/work colleagues. my philosophy being that swear words have the most impact when used at those very 'special' times when the situation really determines their use. also, if you save them up for special occasions, those who know you really well, will know that you're serious, when you do use them!