As I've said before, I'm not a big fan of metrics for sex. (And no, by that I do not mean that I prefer to measure a man's equipment in inches rather than centimeters.) Assigning ratings and statistics to your sexual encounters lessens their ineffable nature and leads to excessive consumption of cheeseburgers. But sometimes, when I'm not actually having sex, I amuse myself by coming up with rating systems that I then never use. The current example relates to nipple play.
You could, if you wanted to, rate nipple play preferences on a scale from 1 to 10 where a 1 means "don't even look at them or I'll start giggling uncontrollably and maybe cry" and 10 means, "bite 'em off; I'll grow more." I've never run into a 10, which is probably just as well because I don't think they really grow back, and if I ponder that any longer, I'll get a mental image that I really don't want to have but which would not have been out of place in Pan's Labyrinth.
I've known at least a couple of 9s. A 9 indicates that I'll work their nipples as hard as I'm comfortable with (anything short of blood, really), and they'll enjoy it. Or at least they won't complain. The first guy who ever asked me to tie him up was probably a 9. I'd actually leave bruises on his nipples, and he would complain about that, but only a couple of days later. And then when I'd asked whether he'd enjoy it, he'd say that he had but that now he was bruised. And then I'd ask whether he wanted me to kiss them and make them all better, and he'd ask me how dumb did I think he was, which I wouldn't answer because I still wanted to fuck him.
My favorite nip guy ever was probably an 8. I would work his nipples very aggressively. Nibble, bite, gnaw. And after an hour or so of that (interspersed with some other things, but his nipples were being worked for most of that time), he might allow that I had reached his limit of intensity, but then after I'd backed off for a couple of minutes, he'd be begging me to get him back to his limit. This particular guy was of European descent, and he had a somewhat huge head of hair, but he had no body hair. I'll take my guys either hairy or smooth, but there was something especially hot about a guy who was naturally hairless. I had always assumed that he waxed or shaved or something, but when I asked, he told me that he'd just never had any body hair.
Nipples on a smooth chest are very hot because of the way they stand out, (Nipples on a furry chest are very hot because you have to dig for them.) and this guy's nipples stood out easily half an inch, and more when I'd been working them for a while. I wish that guy and I still had sex, but he lives around the beltway, and it's too far to go. Also, the first time b&c and I ever had a threeway was with him, and he was a little weird after that, though I'm pretty sure I could get him to play again if I were going to be in the neighborhood. He always had a gratifying amount of enthusiasm for me.
I can only remember hooking up with one 1; unfortunately, the entire encounter was memorably dreary. I'd guess this happened about five or six years ago, and this guy (who was otherwise reasonably attractive) came over and proceeded to tell me about how awful his life was and how no one liked him and how he'd been dating a guy for eight months when the guy just stopped returning his calls. I was trying to be sympathetic, but there are limits, so I hurried him to bed, where he kept asking me if I thought he was attractive. Over and over and over again. He was a top, so anal sex was out, and he kept jumping away because I would accidentally graze his nipples (through his loose t-shirt) while we were making out, and it would send him into near convulsions. He told me that he couldn't even touch them himself. Then he asked me another thirty times whether I liked him and made me promise that I'd call him. And since I'd promised, I did call him a couple of days later, and he never returned the call. Which was just as well -- since I wouldn't have known what to say to him -- but annoying nonetheless.
My own nipples, alas, probably rate a 2. That means that you can play with them a moderate amount, but I won't feel anything, and if you play with them any more than that, I'll have to stop you because it hurts (without any compensating pleasure). Men are frequently surprised that someone with such a voracious appetite for nipples (if a guy puts his hands in front of them, I'll pull them away and say -- firmly -- "access to the nipples must remain unrestricted at all times!") has such inert nipples, but it makes perfect sense to me. Other guys think that since I'm eager to bite their nipples, I should be willing to have my own bitten. "Don't dish it out if you can't take it," they'll say. And I will invariably reply with something that I have found true in most areas of life, and which I will now put in a separate paragraph because it's one of my very best aphorisms.
In my experience, the more you dish out, the less you have to take.
I leave it for others to hypothesize whether and to what extent my enthusiasm for nipples is related to my own mother's failure to breastfeed me. (In fact, I may have to go find a shower just for having written that sentence. Ewww.) My nipple fascination is, to me, yet another area where I see no point in asking why. I am simply grateful.
This is all on my mind because of a recent hookup with someone who's nipple rating I appear to have adjusted. I have long known that a man's enthusiasm for having his nipples played with (Does that make him a nipple bottom because he's screaming in pleasure while I'm chewing on his nipples, or am I the bitch since I'm the one using my mouth? You see what an innocent I am; I don't even know the proper terminology.) can change over time. In the most depressing example of this fact, b&c used to be a 7 (back when he was still trying to impress me, I guess) and now he's at best a 5. On the plus side, he's much better at giving head than he used to be.
But sometimes you get lucky and come across a 2 or 3 whom you can elevate into something greater. I had my buddy B. in my bed over the weekend. I think it was the fourth time we've played. He's always been a good kisser and a decent cocksucker, so we've always had fun, but the last time (i.e., the time before this weekend) I had him over was the first time I got into concentrated nipple play with him. Previously, I'd sucked on them a little, but I hadn't gotten much response. But a month or so ago he came over, and after a decent period of nice kissing, I started to lick and suck on his left nipple.
At first there wasn't much of a reaction, but I decided to keep at it. I bit it very gently and then sucked it in between my lips and started to flick my tongue quickly back and forth across it, and there was suddenly a lot more interest on his part. So I mixed it up for a little while: first on one nipple, then the other. I pushed my tongue harder against the nipple then sucked with my lips while my tongue retracted. He was moaning then, and I went back to the suck-and-flick technique, concentrating on his left nipple. I got into a steady, fast rhythm with my tongue, and before long, his entire body was shaking. If I varied the intensity or the speed, he'd stop shaking, and then I'd work a little harder to make him shake again.
After about forty-five minutes of dedicated nipple play, I took a breather. He told me that he'd never experienced anything like that before and that it was like having a full body orgasm, only without the ejaculation. And then he said. "Wow. You can do anything that you want to me now." So I did. Up until then, he'd always claimed to be a top.
Anyway, this weekend was also a lot of fun, though I no longer felt like I was sailing into uncharted territory. He clearly wanted the intense nipple play again, and I certainly wanted to do that with him, but I wasn't having any more of this "orgasm without the ejaculation" crap. So after a nice long make out session, I worked his nipples for about fifteen minutes to get him nice and hungry for it, then I flipped him onto his stomach and ate his ass for a little while, and when I had it nice and wet and hungry, I took out the thinnest of my butt plugs and pushed it into him. Then I flipped him back over and started working his nipples intensely again until I got him back to the shaking point. I upped the intensity a little more then, and he started writhing and shaking, and then I grabbed his cock and stroked him until he shot. He shot a lot, and he shot hard.
At that point, he really couldn't do anything except lay there and glow, so I finished myself off by hand. He stayed the night, and in the morning I fucked him.
I'd like to play with him plenty more and see if I couldn't work his nipples so that they get bigger. That might happen, but it's not something I'll count on. He wants to be dating someone, and there's no good reason why he isn't, especially now that he's versatile. I don't reckon it'll be long before he's got a boyfriend and is off limits. Though I've been wrong about that sort of thing before.
Dating Theory
10 years ago
3 comments:
You know, this has got to be the first time I've seen someone write exclusively about this! Cool!
I'd have to say I'd put myself in the 7-8 range. I would have said more but the thought of 45 minutes of nip-nibbling with no time-out... well, I just don't know if I'd finally say "stop!".
Thing is, the ideal for me is if the other guy is equally into it - which always seems to be really rare. Most guys are like "no don't do that".
And the flip side is true, too... most guys never even thing of putting mouth to nip.
Sometimes I've basically had to physically drag the guy's face to my chest and at first they're like "what's there to suck here?"
Sigh...
I'm willing to let you have whatever rating you want, Atari. I don't use the rating scale much in practice; i.e., I never think about numbers when I'm chewing nip, and I rarely think about them afterwards. For me, though, an 8 implies something more than nibbling.
I do my best to let a guy play with my nips for a little while, but once the teeth come out, I'm cringing. I understand the fairness angle, but it makes more sense for us to be doing something that we're both loving than for us to be doing something that leaves me wanting to balance my checkbook. And if he really loves having his played with, I can usually make him forget about mine.
and then... there is the 10+ like the tasty young boy with whom i only removed the nipple clamps so i could pierce his nipples.
::deep exhale::
gooooooood times.
http://chaos.typepad.com/chaos/2006/11/another_night_o.html
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