Gay.com really just isn't what it used to be. Back in the day, I often found decent hook-ups there (and I did meet b&c there, and I'm grateful for that), but nowadays, there are better and more popular cruising sites. A lot of the guys who are on gay.com are there out of habit, and they have gay.com running in the background while they're more actively looking on manhunt, or whatever the kids are using these days. There are also, primarily in the rooms dedicated to particular urban areas, small groups of guys who've been hanging out in those rooms for a long time, and they engage in what they believe to be witty conversation. They are mistaken.
But it's about the only adult gay site that isn't blocked by my office's content filter, so sometimes, when I'm horny enough for my judgment to be impaired, I'll log on and see if anyone I know is on. That's how I usually hook up with Pecs and one or two other guys who I see occasionally but by no means regularly or often.
There's this guy in Rockville whom I've played with two or three times. He's an eager kisser and loves having his nipples played with, but he's not otherwise very accommodating, and he has such a bland personality that on at least four or five occasions over the last three years, I've started a conversation with him and chatted with him for ten or fifteen minutes before I remember who he is. And then I end up not hooking up with him because he always says he wants to play with me but he doesn't want to go down on me, even though he describes himself as an oral expert.
I used to think he was just being a jerk, but we chatted for a while yesterday (even after I remembered who he was, which again took ten minutes or so, because I really wasn't about to leave the office any time soon), and he said that he wasn't looking to play because his cock was too sore. I wasn't really interested in his cock, but I found sore cock an odd complaint. He did say that one of his regular guys (he has two regular married men) had played with him for three hours, but I can remember plenty of occasions where I've fucked guys for nearly or even more than three hours without developing a sore cock.
When I pressed him about the sore cock, he said that his married guy was annoyed at him for not being sufficiently submissive, so he'd come over and put him in a chastity device for three hours. Without lube. And during that time, his cock had gotten rubbed raw. Oh, ouch. But he hadn't complained to his friend because he didn't want to anger him by again not being sufficiently submissive.
I didn't react to what he'd said, mostly because I was working really hard at not judging, and he hastened to defend his married dom by saying that the guy really cared about him and that after he'd emailed the married dom to explain about his cock being raw, the guy had come over "with some healing lubes" to help him out. It all sounded a little bit too much like the guy who brings his wife flowers after he beats her, but I kept my opinion to myself, instead merely pointing out that it must be difficult to be in love with a married man. My bland acquaintance said that it was doubly difficult because he was in love with both of his married men. He'd been seeing one of them (the one who rubbed the skin off his cock) for over six years. And, as it happens, his version of being faithful to them is to not suck any other cocks. He says that they appreciate his sacrifice and his so-called fidelity.
I didn't continue the conversation for long after that. What's the point, really? I suppose I could point out to this guy that while he's spending his weekends, evenings, and early mornings waiting for his married guys to call, he could instead be developing a real romantic and/or social life, but my interaction with him suggests that he's not really equipped to have much of a romantic and/or social life beyond regular hook-ups with married guys. And who knows, maybe those married guys have some actual feelings of affection towards him. On the other hand, it's pretty clear that they also have lives and that their feelings towards him, whatever they might be, aren't anywhere near as strong as the feelings in the opposite direction. It's hard to imagine that this guy has very much self-respect, but maybe he never did, and having regular horizontal quality time with two men is the most he can expect. Especially since he already has a dog.
Anyway, the whole thing made me very much not want to get together with him again, even for making out and hard nipple work, which I normally love. It's very difficult to deal with guys whom I feel sorry for but don't really respect or even like. I just hope I can remember who he is so I don't start chatting with him again on gay.com.
In other TED-not-getting-laid news, Giancarlo, the extremely sexy Filipino who made me go on a pseudo-date with him before we had sex for two hours, and I have been in touch. We'd planned to get together for an overnight just before b&c got back from his last trip, but Giancarlo had had to cancel at the last minute due to a family obligation. Normally that sort of last-minute cancellation makes me excuse myself so that I can retrieve the eyes that have rolled clear out of my head, but in this case it was fairly obvious that he was telling the truth.
Anyway, after being snowed out Sunday night, he finally made it over to my place this evening. I left the office at the scandalously early time of 7:30 to meet him, but I wasn't meeting him alone. B&c is still in town and was home tonight, so do you see where this is headed? Not, alas, to a hot threesome. Instead, I prepared Giancarlo's taxes for him. And he's getting a very nice refund. His return is very simple, but more than he could handle, apparently. It was distracting to have him sitting next to me at the computer, our knees and sometimes our hands touching, while b&c was in the living room reading. Not to mention that there are other things I'd rather have been doing with and to him. But I got the job done. The tax job, that is.
I'd originally agreed to do his taxes after we'd hooked up and in conjunction with an overnight visit. But he's a good guy (and cute, which doesn't hurt), so I figured I should probably help him out even if I wasn't getting sex for it. I don't know whether that makes me a nice guy or a sap, but it helps, in my mind anyway, that he'd probably want to spend the night with me again even if I couldn't help him with his taxes. He likes good kissers, and, well, that's me.
Anyway, we spent a little while doing his taxes, mostly because I don't have the software here that I have at work, so I was entering data directly onto .pdf versions of the tax forms. My printer's very slow, so we made out some while the forms were printing out. Then I showed him where to sign, gave him addresses, kissed him some more, groped him a bit, got groped in return, and then said goodnight. There's something undeniably hot about grabbing a guy's cock through his jeans while you're kissing him when you know you can't finish what you're starting. Or at least we couldn't finish it then. B&c's off to Jordan at the end of the week, and even though I'll be working very late every night that YFU isn't over, I'm hopeful that I'll find a night to have him back over for another go round.