Thursday, March 12, 2009

anywhere u are !!!


Life is hard sometimes, readers. I don't mean my life, for the most part, except maybe during tax season, but even when a day is especially long and tough, like today, it's just work, and it all gets better in a month or so. I'm guessing the guy who wrote the following craigslist posting, though, is going to be miserable for a lot longer than that. I suppose parts of it could be considered funny, but mostly it's just sad.
sorry about being an asshole (anywhere u are!!)
Reply to: pers-xpxbp-1071854081@craigslist.org
Date: 2009-03-12, 1:46PM EDT

its been a little bit difficult just to forget about who u are!! about what the deal was!! about the great sex we have... but man life is soooooooooo fucking unfair!! and maybe somedayn i will find a great guy like u!!! well i was hopping that u were romeo hahaha............. but its just a fucking dream................... and i cant take u out from my mind!! even when i said... that is better for me to not see u again!! cause im the one losing here!1 and just didnt wanna get hurt more................................

here is the history!!

horny one day..and looking for a some hot sex .............exactly here in Cl lol!!! well lucky me i find a three wya.... we set up the meetin and i went to ur friend house!! we had amazing sex... and it waesnt a three way cause ur friend...didnt do anythign and he leave us alone having the best sex i think i ever had!! u are great kisses and so sweet!!!! u are older than me/.... and maybe i am a such a kid.......... cause i told that day!!!!!!! if u wanna see me again! make sure call me back..or send me a message!!

u did!! u send me a message after 30 min a left ur friend house...and telling me that i was cute and that wanna see me again!!......................... i really like u!! but fuck!!! u told me also that u have a Bf ............ and u live with him!!////////////////////// i get crush... but i didnt care lol!!!!!!!!!!!! we see each other!!! i dont know why??? !! im the kind of guy who will never go out with someone in a relacionship/!!!!! but i did!! we text all day!! u call me at night..or i call u!! .for a couple moths!!!.................. but always was sex!! and u told please dont fall in love of me!! ........................ thats was the deal..i get it!!

and i fuck it up!!! ............. i felt in love like a MTF for u!!.................... and i told u yesterday that i dont wanna see u again..................... cause im the one who is losing!!!! u didnt say nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i erase ur number and i erase everything of u!! ......................................now?????????? what can i do? i miss u!! and i know i cant have u!! i cant have a tyny chance with u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!................................... its that the end??????? well i make it to be that way but i was hopping that u gonna say something.................. like stay!!!!!! but u didnt..................... ........................ :'( i really do miss u..............

* Location: anywhere u are!!


That posting is a cautionary tale for everyone involved in casual sex. I'm unfazed by most of the potential hazards to myself: I know how to play safe, I'm a good judge of character, and the odds of my getting emotionally hurt are remote. I occasionally get pissed off at guys who don't follow through on their promises, but that sort of anger never survives until the next morning. But I'm more concerned about other people. There's some small (sometimes large, depending) amount of responsibility that conveys whenever you share the intimacy of sex with someone. Even with someone whose name you never learn.

And while I don't think I'm all that, I'm aware of the possibility of other people developing some sort of dependency on me. It's not necessarily an emotional dependency. Nike, for example, is currently annoyed at me because I haven't been at his beckon call for a while now, but he'd be just as happy if I found other cocks for him to suck. Clearly, it should be his responsibility to find cock for himself, but I still feel slightly (very, very slightly) bad about the whole situation. And there have been other occasions in the past where, despite full disclosure and adequate warnings, guys have come to want more than I was in a position to give.

Potential emotional commitments are easiest to manage when you and your hook-up are in similar situations. If you're both partnered, then neither of you is likely to develop an unwanted attachment out of vulnerability. (It's a good reason to hook up with married men. Also: they kiss well.) And if you do become friends, then you can enjoy an appropriate level of affection and emotional connection from a position of security.

Different people are wired differently. Guys who can't engage in casual sex without developing inappropriate attachments should avoid casual sex, and other men should avoid those guys. But on the whole, there's a lot more good than bad to be had from the sharing of pleasure, and the guys who entirely eschew hooking up out of a fear of safety (emotional, physical, medical) are probably throwing out the baby with the bath water. Still I feel sorry for the guy who posted the ad.


Unlike the guy who posted this ad. This one you can laugh at. Hell, email him and mock him for all I care:
Trade Labor for Blow Job - 46 (Bethesda)
Reply to: pers-v2qay-1073625126@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-03-13, 4:25PM EDT

Odd request - I need a mechanic to change my brake pads (front and rear). I will buy the pads and in exchange for your assistance I will give you a great blow job.

Thanks and let's help each other out.

* Location: Bethesda

Dude. Seriously? I mean, we all know you'd give that mechanic a bj for free.

7 comments:

Atlantagent said...

Oh, Lordy, are we really going back to a heavy Craigslist content again? Because I realize you are maxed out on the job, but these are always the least engaging posts you write. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

I think offering to buy the brake pads is a nice touch.

Anonymous said...

I like your craiglist posts. They've been enlightening. I have been amazed at how easily guys out there feel free to not show up. Obviously I am not the only one to suffer these fools. This post was very touching. Poor guy. But he has some real strength too. He cut it off. Yet his pain is palatable.

Anonymous said...

You keep posting as many of your Craigslist items as you want! It is an interesting form of investigative journalism and social commentary that I usually find to be more interesting than funny.

Eric said...

Please forgive me for questioning you, since I know you really pay attention to these things, but, is it really "beckon call"?

TED said...

"Beckon call" is a gray area, and I'm clearly swimming against the stream when I use it. I can't bring myself to write "beck and call" because it doesn't make sense to me. It does appear to be the original phrase, but beck also appears to be a shortening of beckon. I paused for a while over the phrase, and I probably should have gone back and rewritten the passage to avoid the issue entirely. I very much like beckon call, but it's not particularly defensible.

Unknown said...

I looked up "beckon call" myself. The issue appears to be very controversial, and there are some very self-righteous defenders of both sides.

I swear, I learn more about English language on this blog than I do about sex.