Saturday, November 24, 2007

Clearly, There's Something in the Water



Here's another annoying series of e-mails from someone who only looks at the picture. It comes, naturally, out of a craigslist ad. The e-mails would be more annoying if I hadn't already hooked up from the ad's responses. Still, this level of idiocy is an accomplishment that ought not go unnoticed. As usual, my ad was very complete and gave and asked for very specific information.

From: Mauricio
To: TED
Subject: Ur ad on Craigslist
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:07 AM

I wanna suck you now!!!


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:12 AM

Stats? Do you like to make out? Where are you coming from?


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:14 AM

37yo handsome 190lbs 7.5" uc and you??


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:16 AM

They were in the ad.

I'm free now if you want to play, and if you like to kiss.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:17 AM

No stats in ad,...


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:19 AM

Indeed there were:
Top guy here. [height, weight, cock size] thick cut cock. Looking for a bottom who likes to kiss. I'm also into oral, nip play and ass play, and of course I love to fuck ass. I also have a wild side, so if you're a sub and/or like kink, that's even better, but optional.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:24 AM

Well? Ready???


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:26 AM

Sure. How far from [my exurb] are you?


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:27 AM

I am in falls church guy...


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:28 AM

I want to rim you and suck you to cumpletion...


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:28 AM

Falls Church is way around the beltway. I'm in the middle of Montgomery County.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:30 AM

So wanna cum over???


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:31 AM

No, thanks. As the ad said, I'm hosting, and you're a long way away.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:31 AM

I'll make it worth your while guy... you can stay here guy, we'll cuddle
up.....


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:32 AM

You sound like a lot of fun, but I don't feel like driving an hour tonight.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:32 AM

So why bother me twinky???


From: TED
To: Mauricio
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:34 AM

Dude. YOU replied to MY ad. And "twinky?" Did you even look at my stats or pic? I'm 43, and I'm really not that smooth.


From: Mauricio
To: TED
Date: Nov 24, 2007 12:34 AM

Piss off!!!



Oh well. Next!

3 comments:

Will said...

Some people are born hopeless.

John said...

And some have hopelessness thrust upon them. Uh. Wait. Since you're the top, I wasn't implying that... .

copperred said...

Sex makes the middling, garden variety idiots into superhuman wonder men of idiocy.